Having to deal with difficult parenting situations during or after a divorce can be hard on everyone, but it’s especially hard on the kids. A parenting coordinator comes in handy at this point. They help separated or divorced parents resolve their daily disagreements about their parenting plan or custody arrangements. Their job is not to take sides, but to calm things down, make sure everyone can talk to each other, and look out for what’s best for the child. They give order and direction, which makes co-parenting easier to handle and more focused on the child during tough times.
What is a Parenting Coordinator?
A parenting coordinator is a trained, impartial coordinator who helps separated or divorced parents settle ongoing parenting disputes. Their main goal is to help parents follow their parenting or custody plan while avoiding fights that could hurt the kids. Parenting coordinators could be mental health workers, lawyers, or mediators with special training in dealing with conflicts and how families work. They try to make communication better, lower tension, and find answers to common parenting problems like making decisions or having different ideas about how to discipline.
What Does a Parenting Coordinator Do?
A parenting coordinator is very important for helping parents who have a lot of problems with each other handle their co-parenting duties after divorce. Their main goal is to protect the kids’ mental health and reduce stress by helping parents talk to each other better and settle small arguments. They give advice on everyday things like visitation schedules, school events, medical decisions, planning vacations, and many more.
Parenting coordinators often help parents work out their differences so they don’t have to return to court. If parents can’t come to an agreement, the coordinator may be able to make decisions about small issues that parents have to follow, based on the law or a court order. They also teach parents how to talk to each other better, set healthy limits, and keep the child’s best interests in mind.
Parenting coordinators may work with the family for a set amount of time. Their help can make things a lot easier on both parents and kids emotionally by giving parents consistent, child-centered solutions to daily problems in a structured, professional setting.
When Can You Use a Parenting Coordinator in Canada?
In Canada, a parenting coordinator can be used when divorced parents are still fighting a lot over parenting problems, even though they have a formal parenting or custody plan in place. The main goal is to avoid lawsuits and settle disagreements out of court, especially when communication has broken down and cooperation is difficult. Parenting coordination isn’t right for every family; it works best when there is a lot of tension and both parents are having a hard time.
Once you have a parenting plan in place, you can use a parenting coordinator. Their job is not to make the plan, but to help put it into action and settle any small disagreements that come up while it’s being used. Some examples are disagreements about when to pick up and drop off the child, when to take leave, extracurricular activities, school choices, or how to talk to the child.
In most provinces, parenting coordination is a voluntary process. But sometimes, if the judge thinks it is best for the child, they may order parenting cooperation. The first step is to sign a written agreement or court order that spells out the parenting coordinator’s authority, length of service, fees, and ability to make decisions. Families who use a parenting planner can save money on legal fees and give their kids a more stable home life.
Difference Between a Parenting Coordinator and a Judge or Mediator
Parenting coordinators, judges, and mediators can all help settle family disputes, but they do so in very different ways and have different levels of power and participation. Here’s what makes them different:
Role and purpose
- As a parenting coordinator, your job is to help enforce and handle parenting plans by settling day-to-day parenting disputes after a court order is in place.
- During a lawsuit or hearing, the judge makes legally binding decisions about child support, visitation, and custody.
- A mediator helps parents talk things out and agree on a parenting plan or settlement.
Authority
- Parenting coordinators may be able to make some decisions about small problems, but they can’t change custody or make big legal choices.
- A judge has the legal power to make choices about parenting, child custody, and child support that can be enforced by the courts.
- A mediator helps both sides come to an understanding on their own.
Timing of Involvement
- Parenting coordinator is hired after a parenting plan or court order is in place, usually to help with ongoing issues.
- Judge is involved in the legal process, especially when open or disputed cases occur.
- A mediator is usually involved before going to court or early on in the disagreement to keep things from going to court.
Focus
- Parenting coordinator works to reduce tension, improve communication, and make sure that parents are consistent.
- Judge looks at the child’s legal rights, duties, and what’s best for them from a legal point of view.
- The mediator’s job is to help people work together and find a middle ground so everyone can be happy.
Time and Cost
- Parenting coordinators are faster and cheaper than going back to court.
- Usually, going to court for judges costs more and takes more time.
- Mediators are usually a quick and cheap way to come to a deal.
Benefits of Working With a Parenting Coordinator
There are many benefits to working with a parenting coordinator. These are some of the main benefits:
Reduces Conflict
Parenting coordinators help keep arguments under control so that small problems don’t turn into big fights. This makes it easier for parents to work together.
Focuses on the Child’s Best Interests
They care most about the child’s health and safety. They help parents make choices that are good for their child’s social and physical growth.
Improves Communication
Parenting coordinators teach and support parents to talk to each other in a respectful and effective way, which helps them co-parent better.
Faster Dispute Resolution
Parenting coordinators can deal with and fix problems quickly, without having to wait for court dates. This saves time and stress.
Cost-Effective
Going to court a lot can cost a lot of money. A lot of the time, a parenting coordinator is a cheaper way to solve small parenting problems.
Final Words
A parenting coordinator can be very helpful for families who want to stay stable and focus on their children’s well-being when there is a lot of conflict between parents. To encourage cooperation and consistency, parenting coordinators act as a connector between court decisions and the problems that parents face in real life. Whether chosen by the parents or appointed by the court, their participation can greatly lower stress, boost communication, and make the home a healthier place for the kids.
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